One of my friends, who is a colleague, always signs the end of her emails with the quote “Children learn what they live.” It’s always made me smile and I’ve always agreed, but I thought of it specifically tonight when watching the Steelers/Ravens football game with my family. We are huge Steelers fans and as my husband says, the usual emotion gets turned up a notch in the playoffs (especially in the case of my brother Greg).  The children (mine are 6 and 4 and my niece is 3 and nephew 5) easily settle into their regular kiddo “football routine.” Color. Play Dress Up. Read each other books. Expect food at half time. Don’t ask questions until between plays.  Have fun. Don’t kill each other.  Don’t tattle unless there is blood. But I had to laugh today during the highly emotional last minutes of this game, as I watched my niece Kennedy run to grab her Steelers sweatshirt, put it on, and stand in front of the television screaming “Scoooooore,” and “Deeeeeeefense,” and “Touchdooooown” while jumping up and down. 

I immediately thought of my friend’s quote. Sure I could spend hours stressing about if Gabriella will learn her math problems to do them fast enough for her timed test at the end of the year. Or I could spend hours trying to teach Leila Grace to tie her shoes so she’s ready by Kindergarten next year. But no matter what I teach my children in a conscious and intentional way, they are learning much more by what I am teaching them in an unintentional way. Children do learn what they live. They learn by watching our example. Are we teaching them patience? Forgiveness? An even temper? Are we modeling being a caring friend? A good partner? I know I don’t always give the best example to my children. But I know I want to try to live what I want them to learn and so I’ll try harder each day.  It’s all any of us can do.   If we could all make those actions and behaviors that are so unintentional to us as intentional as we make teaching sight words, drilling plays out of a sports book, or using flash cards to teach math skills, together we would raise compassionate, thoughtful children who not only attack life with passion and purpose, but would enjoy it to the fullest! Let’s try together!

P.s. For the record, I know many (especially around the area where I live) would argue living life as a Steelers fan is not something any child should learn, but our house would certainly disagree! Here we go Steelers! Great win!